Count Your Blessings #102 – Making Memories

One of the wisest things someone ever said to me about parenting was this:

“The time that you have your children on your terms is very short. After that they have you on their terms”

This friend then went on to explain that they believed that making memories with your children is an incredibly important thing to do.

Since that time I’ve then made it a priority to make memories with my children.

Jonathan is now nearly half way through his teenage years, his time of independence is fast approaching. The time available for me to make memories, on my terms, is slipping away.

I’ve found it helpful to try and think about making memories in two ways; traditions and exceptions.

Traditions are those times, places and activities that we do consistently and repeatedly. I’ve talked before about the tradition of Christmas Tree Decorating at church, but traditions don’t have to be linked to a major festival or external event. We have some family traditions too. We are all looking forward to visiting friends in Edinburgh in the next two weeks, this is something we do a couple of times a year and have done for a few years now, it’s a tradition. Every time we go we build more memories.

Exceptions are those things that we do that are out of the ordinary and special. During our holiday after Easter we did a few exceptional things. The weather itself was exceptional, but that wasn’t what will make them lasting memories. There’s something about exceptions that mean that you need to do something, there is something which makes memories you have had to work for last longer. On one day Jonathan and I decided to go and tick off another Wainwright; this time we (I) chose Great Gable. People talk about all sorts of reasons as to why they climb mountains, for me it’s primarily about building memories. The last day of our holiday was also used for memory making, we went for a picnic by Derwentwater, that’s probably not enough to make a long lasting memory, swimming in the lake in April probably is.

I also try to make the effort to make memories in my Christian life in a similar way; traditions and exceptions. Quiet days used to be an exception, but we are starting to build them into a tradition. If an exception is really good, then it is OK for it to become a tradition.